1 a (1): friendly regard shown toward another especially by a superior (2): approving consideration or attention : approbation b: partiality c archaic : leniency d archaic : permission e: popularity
3 a: gracious kindness ; also : an act of such kindness Ruth 2:1-7
I've been thinking this week about whose favor I am seeking. It's been largely prompted by the passage in the book of Ruth where Ruth tells Naomi that she is going to glean behind "anyone in whose eyes I find favor." In the King James Version, "favor" is translated "grace," so that made me curious about how I think about favor. In this context, Ruth is really just looking for someone who will look favorably upon her and allow her to glean behind them.
It's funny how God will take a nugget of thought and lead you down the path he wants you to take. By the end of the week, He had made clear to me that I have a family member who is very critical and I am constantly on edge and on guard around this person. I am guarded around The Critic because I don't want to provide fuel for criticism of me after we've been together. What I want is "friendly regard," "approving consideration" and maybe even a bit of "gracious kindness." That's not terribly likely to happen since The Critic is very critical of most everything in life. More importantly, that's not whose favor I need to seek.
Paul says in Galatians 1:10, "For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God ? Or am I striving to please men ? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ." I certainly spend too much of my time trying to please men and that caught me up short as I thought about seeking favor and how I should correctly approach that. How do I seek God's favor through my relationship with The Critic? I think the answer to that comes from my study of I Peter earlier this year.
Peter instructs us to love each other "fervently." In the Greek, the word "fervent" carries with it a connotation of "stretched out." In sharp contrast to that, the best description of my recent interactions with The Critic have been guarded, the very opposite of being stretched out and therefore vulnerable. In examining how I could seek God's favor, not man's, in my relationship with The Critic, I think I must be willing to be fervent. The Critic's criticisms and generally negative view of life are not ultimately about me. The best approach that I believe I can take is to be willing to be myself, even if that means I am exposed to harsh words, subtle criticisms and slights.
One of the great things about seeking God's favor is that His favor will not falter. Even were I able to remain guarded in my interactions with The Critic and blunt the criticisms of me and my family for a time, I would never be able to maintain The Critic's favor. The favor of any man is fleeting because we are easily satisfied, easily distracted creatures. If I will instead focus on pursuing the continued favor of God and on using His favor to bless others, the favor of men will gradually fade into the background.
Peter instructs us to love each other "fervently." In the Greek, the word "fervent" carries with it a connotation of "stretched out." In sharp contrast to that, the best description of my recent interactions with The Critic have been guarded, the very opposite of being stretched out and therefore vulnerable. In examining how I could seek God's favor, not man's, in my relationship with The Critic, I think I must be willing to be fervent. The Critic's criticisms and generally negative view of life are not ultimately about me. The best approach that I believe I can take is to be willing to be myself, even if that means I am exposed to harsh words, subtle criticisms and slights.
One of the great things about seeking God's favor is that His favor will not falter. Even were I able to remain guarded in my interactions with The Critic and blunt the criticisms of me and my family for a time, I would never be able to maintain The Critic's favor. The favor of any man is fleeting because we are easily satisfied, easily distracted creatures. If I will instead focus on pursuing the continued favor of God and on using His favor to bless others, the favor of men will gradually fade into the background.
3 comments:
I'm so glad you're writing your thoughts for me to read. It's almost as good as having you back in my Bible study again (not quite, but almost...). This was a good post for me to think about, especially with the events of the past few weeks. I don't really like controversy all that much, mostly because I just want people to like me. But I also am overly opinionated and can't keep my mouth shut (not a good combination), and because of some of my thoughts and words I've recently gained a not-so-favorable opinion by others. I honestly feel like I'm acting on the convictions God has given me, but it's really hard for me to have people think badly of me. Thanks for the reminder that it's not their favor I should be seeking...
You'll notice that I don't say anywhere in this post that it's easy to not seek the favor of people! I think most of us genuinely want to be liked (even loved) by others and it is so difficult to truly focus on what God wants us to do. That becomes even more difficult when other Christians question whether you ARE, in fact, acting on the convictions God has given you.
I have a mental picture that God is so great and big that no single one of us can reflect all of His priorities at once. That's why He does give us different convictions. That's all well and good when most others share your convictions and decidedly more difficult when you feel alone (and sometimes even judged).
Amen sister!
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