Monday, April 20, 2009


Merriam Webster says 2 b: the front part of the lower trunk and thighs of a seated person
WordGirl says: the place my children once sat

Last week, K and I walked to pick up A & B from school one day. I had allotted plenty of time, so we arrived early. I leaned against a tree and she sat in my lap while we waited (and talked, of course, this is K) before dismissal.

Today, I drove past a local store and saw another mom sitting with her two children in her lap. It was a beautiful image and it struck me that it's hard to fit two of my daughters in my lap and nearly impossible to fit all three. A is 9, B is 7 and K will be 5 next month. I have joked with K that she will be able to sit in my lap all of her life because she is so small and likely to stay that way. (J has always said he hopes our girls make it to 5'0", but I'm not sure that will happen with K.)

But my time of having my girls sit in my lap is limited, if not already at an end. For the most part, I am glad my children are growing up. Many of my friends do not share this sentiment. They love having preschoolers and are more than a tad sad to see them leave infancy and head towards toddlerhood and all that awaits. But I love having children who are school age. I love talking with them about books I read that they are reading. I love hearing them share random science facts I had long forgotten. I love seeing them make connections I never made and invent games I never played.

But every now and then, I realize I will someday miss the little girls they once were. I will miss A curling up beside me to listen to a book. I will miss B striding into the room to show me her latest art work. I will miss K jumping into my lap to tell me her latest observation at full volume.

I know I'll love who they become as well. I already love seeing A use her gifts and talents and wonder how B will ever find a job that utilizes her many, diverse talents.

Hopefully they will one day give me grandchildren to fill my lap again, but in the meantime, I want to soak up those little moments together while we have them. I know they will be gone far too soon.


Chocolate, Vanilla and Caramel said...

What an awesome post! It actually brought tears to my eyes. I got a good chuckle out of your comment about K sitting in your lap and talking, "...of course, this is K." Sounds like my daughter. She wakes up in the morning and has a million things to say. It befuddles my husband who takes at least 30 minutes to wake up.

I share your sentiments -- happy my kids are growing up, but also a bit nostalgic knowing that these times won't last forever.

Also, I saw your Activity Jar blog. What a cute idea! We must be pretty similar. I'm also an introvert mom. Have you ever taken the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator? I took it in college for the first time and was an INFJ.

Variations On A Theme said...

I love holding the kids on my lap. Olivia still fits on my lap, but snuggling with her in the bed works better. Ben is still clingingly snuggly. It's so wonderful. I try to cherish it, but I fail to appreciate it fully, because I'm also looking forward to the day Ben is completely potty-independent.

Natalie said...

I'm here to tell you, you can sit on your mama's lap at any size or age!

I feel the same way about Ford. I get excited about all the new things he learns and can do on his own. He's fiercely independent, so being older suits him (and me) much better than infancy.

I like to look at pictures and videos from when Ford was a baby, but I don't wish it back. I am trying to enjoy him where he is, whatever age that may be!

Chocolate, Vanilla and Caramel said...

Yes, the whole friendship thing is so complicated, isn't it?!! One commenter added the fact of liking the mom, and the kids liking each other, but she didn't like the other kid! :) I think I could definitely add several things to my list -- "Do I like your kids?!" and "are your kids around the same age as my kids because I need a little advice now and then..."

I think maybe that's why I enjoy blogging so much and reading other people's blogs. You can have a mini support group and it doesn't matter how far away the person lives or the ages of their children!